Emotionally Focused Therapy is a model of therapy that focuses on the heart of the problem between couples, families, and within individuals. That is, when there is an argument or challenge taking place, no matter what its content, there is usually a conversation going on underneath it. This conversation can be summed up with the question "Are you there for me?" We call this the ARE conversation, and you can think of it as (A) Are you accessible to me? (R) Will you be responsive to me? (E) When I reach out to you and you respond, will you be emotionally present with me? Working towards answering yes to each of these questions helps relationships thrive. These questions can also be posed to individuals to help them truly be there for themselves, which in turn frees them to be more present in other relationships.
At its core, EFT works to create safety within relationships and foster loving, mutual bonds. Extensive research shows that it is the quality of our relationships (safe, mutual attachments) that leads to lasting happiness, not money or power or achievements. In my work with EFT, I am doing just that, working to heal attachment wounds, help clients better understand themselves and each other, and encourage the flourishing of a mutual safe haven and sanctuary within relationship that allows people to weather any storm. I strongly believe in this model and am honored to practice it.
You can learn more about EFT by visiting the website of ICEEFT: www.iceeft.com. The co-founder of EFT, Dr. Sue Johnson, has written a book for couples, to be used with or without therapy. I highly recommend it.